skin deep

i've realized a lot of shit keeps changing and it's happening way too fast. i can't keep my emotions in line and i find myself lurking in the past. i can't bring it back, the end, it's gone. i want to move on but i can't. so many good memories, so many good people, all gone. my old best friend of six years grew up and now is in a treatment home. how can things go from great to shit so fast. i've given up on so many people. i find myself complaining about things more and more when i should be greatful and excited for what my future holds. i've treated some amazing people like shit and lost my way with my lord and savior. i can't figure out what's happening next but i promise it's time for me to let go and change with everything and everyone else. no more complaining and tears. i'm sorry if i've taken any of you for granted these past few months and even years. i'm mostly changing for myself though, because i want to be happy like i used to be but in a new and better way. i think i'll start by toning my body in a healthy way with excercise.